as every leaf falls

life changes quickly abruptly seasons that felt never ending suddenly lost in the past 17 turns to 23 single turns to wife & summer turns to fall once again unable to recall where the time went I look back on this year remembering fondly all the firsts of living in Washington the new friends I've found the challenges I've overcome the love that grew and gritted through a memory of sorts that has also come to mind about the steadiness of our God as every leaf falls He knows where each will land watching from my balcony yellow leaves flutter to the ground branches shaken by the slight breeze and I think I feel like those trees sometimes unsure of what to hold onto for this next season because even small unexpectancies make it difficult to juggle it all I want to keep it all close organized planned out I hope I can grow stronger to hold it all up to be better each day but then I remember it's okay my arms get tired and it doesn't matter what I have to show my worth is defined by Whose I am & not by what the world says of me I did learn & I grew & I will continue to but sorting through my leaves my tasks, dreams, worries, or loves is of no use weighing of their worth is not for me to do I will get it all wrong out of order making idols out of joys overcome by what I am incapable of but He is more than me. all of them are known by Him held by Him & refined by Him Him who is grander He who is greater than me my dreams my worries & my loves & as every leaf falls from my hands He knows where each will land He will pick them up & hold them close His power made perfect in my weakness so even when I feel overwhelmed by juggling the responsibilities of this life loving my husband well working to glorify the Lord resting in Him caring for His beloved children honoring His creation apologizing for the messes I've created & idols I've entertained believing my emotions instead of God's truth

I'm going to fall short I'm going to mess up but I have a Father, Creator, God who loves so radically that He sent His Son to do what I could not do so that I could be forgiven for what I could not earn & be cared for & sustained by the ONE who CAN He is gracious. He is powerful. He is all-knowing & yet He is still loving. He is perfect. He is holy. He is eternal. He is more. more than me. more than enough. more than I deserve. He is worthy of all praise. Soli Deo Gloria "Brothers, I tell you this: Flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, and corruption cannot inherit incorruption. Listen! I am telling you a mystery: We will not all fall asleep, but we will all be changed, in a moment, in the blink of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we will be changed. For this corruptible must be clothed with incorruptibility, and this mortal must be clothed with immortality. When this corruptible is clothed with incorruptibility, and this mortal is clothed with immortality, then the saying that is written will take place: Death has been swallowed up in victory. Death, where is your victory? Death, where is your sting? Now the sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ! Therefore, my dear brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always excelling in the Lord’s work, knowing that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." 1 Corinthians 15:50‭-‬58 HCSB